Ok I have to get it out, just for the record atleast—OCD to wash hands. I didn’t even know about it till now, when I already have it. I know that over a period of time I contracted a thing called Pathological doubt in to my system, but I always liked to deal with Mind-pathos, this is something really new, sort of a thing on which you wait for few months before saying “Hey, do u mind eating less because it’s getting in the way of sex”.
But what do I do now? read some manual, curb my compulsiveness, like I curbed my drive to steal beautiful things? Or should I read some Online tips to double your dating manual? No, I think I should confess the onslaught of intrusive thoughts with a priest in a church, instead of breaking waters to prevent further rubbing away of my brains. Off the track, but I just observed that my name is Ajay Jetti (in all the records after college) and I seem to use this name, but my passport has Ajay Jetty typed on it. One fine day I am just going to evade a lawsuit against me using this OCD-washing-hand as my cover–“Sorry? Jetti isn’t even a word! I am Ajay Jetty; I refute it for the love of god”
I wish my brain had chosen some other kind of thing, like “mental status examination ability failure”, sounds fun, but the current one is making me less productive; I don’t know if I can last writing a 20-25 minutes of writing small blog post (like all the posts in this blog), without washing my hands atleast once (as I type this, I am just back from washing hands). And what about bathing ha? Yeah, I seem to wash myself these days when I am bored (apart from the regular washing chores). I can’t write (atleast now) about how I feel after using public toilets these days, I can tell you that I feel like someone has taken away my right to free speech, no no no, that is already squandered by you know what and you know who, anyways, yes, right to write? Yes, seems more appropriate.
Manav Nair was my friend/room-mate/guitarist/dope-mate/ in college. He died few months back. The last time I saw him was near a lake, the same lake in which he died swimming (for reasons not known). Ok, coming to point, when I had decided to drop out of college after second year, we were roomies for about a month—I remember not having a bath for 12 straight days, Manav was used to it, I thought I can do it too. I sometimes used to wake up with a dog sleeping next to be in my bed….
And tonight on CBS at 9, American doping industry battles the………
Sorry for the break, I had to take a bath after writing the previous lines. I don’t intend to push myself getting rid of this OCD, in a way it isn’t that bad a thing when compared to lot of other things. What I had OCD to blink my eyes a hundred times per minute? That is scary, I mean seriously. After “experimenting love” with a woman friend (lack of figurative) last week (don’t worry I am writing your name darling), the usual positions were occupied after the “love” was done, she was lying with her head partly on my chest, and her right shoulder partly on my left hand, my right hand on her back, I hope I did a good job for you to figure out the exact scene. You wouldn’t believe it, the washroom was right in front of my eyes, I mean you can get off the bed and there you are—you can just wash your hands. I was already done washing, she was done washing, the time I am talking about is when you get “settled” after making love, I wanted to sleep quickly, and otherwise, I would again do to and fro to the washroom. But after a while I gave up, I finally asked her “can I wash my hands?” she said No. Ok, I just forgot two things while typing the last few lines—One, that this is not Letters to the penthouse, second…I mean come on!